Perkara Berkenaan Anak Yang Menakutkan Aku

1. Potty training. ’nuff said.

2. Judgmental people.

Contoh :

“Eh Mashitah, kau tak bf (breastfeed) anak kau ke? Kau tak sayang dia ke? Kau tanak bagi segala nutrien yang terbaik kepada anak kau ke??” ujar Maimunah sambil menyuapkan french fries kepada anaknya yang berusia setahun. 

“Anak aku nanti aku nak hantar dia ke tadika Qudees. Ye lah, aku nak bagi yang terbaik kat my precious princess.” kata Hamidah yang tahap pendidikan diri sendiri meragukan dan hobi masa lapangnya mengomen dalam blog Beautiful Mara. 

“Aku beli baju raya anak aku ni kat Pumkin Pach, ye lah tengah ada sale ni. Baju dia kualiti elok. Anak kau pakai baju Carrefor lagi ke tahun ni?” soal Lela yang keupayaan mengejanya boleh dipertikaikan.

Ah macam-macam lagi lah. Pendek katanya selagi kau bernafas orang akan komen dan judge atas segala perlakuan kau. Umpama kau bernafas pakai gas hidrogen, tak seperti mereka yang lain hidu gas oksigen.

3. Tantrum

Aku tak gemar tengok budak-budak tantrum kat pasaraya minta barang mainan atau nak naik kuda robot dari mak bapak diorang. Lagi-lagi kalau budak tu tak comel (seperti makbapak dia). Takutnya aku kalau anak aku kalau tak comel (mustahil) dan meronta-ronta nak mainan di toys r us? Oh tuhan tidakkkk.

4. Mengajar ABC, 123, alif ba ta.

Aku tak tahu sama ada aku punya kesabaran untuk ini semua. Justeru aku makan kismis, kurma, almond, susu kambing sekerap mungkin dari sekarang agar anak aku lahir genius dan aku tak perlu mengajar beliau benda-benda remeh sebegini. Apa barang ABC, hafal chemistry formula terus.

5. Kena ejek kat sekolah.

Ye lah, nama anak aku nanti Putera Rayyan Marsupial Dewata Raya dan Puteri Homo Sapiens Batrisya Amanee. Confirm ada kawan-kawan sedarjah yang mempunyai nama pasca kampung seperti Ryan dan Danish yang akan mengejek mereka.

Banyak lagi sebenarnya. Nanti aku update lagi.


fakta, bukan auta

# aku baru start layan The Walking Dead. nohorrom takut.

# aku mengaku yang aku ada skepticism terhadap semua perkara termasuk agama. perkara ini lahir dari tindakan refleks otak aku untuk menyoalkan setiap perkara dalam hidup ini (mentally. i dont question things out loud. takda faedah pun dari situ). ubat untuk those who are skeptics? faith, i reckon.

# chill out, will ya? aku tak faham orang yang cepat melatah / melenting. itu sebab kadang-kadang orang yang blur tu lagi bagus. tak la dia makan hati seperti semua benda tu orang tuju pasal dia. kau relek boleh?

# kim jong un (beserta mendiang bapak dan atuknya) is the most paranoid man on earth. north korea is crazy as hell.

# aku rindu zaman uni dulu. zaman punya kawan gila-gila dan funny as hell. zaman stressed out over littlest things (like getting an A for a bloody english paper. je pun.) yang pastinya aku tak rindu – sistem birokrasi dalam uni (sama ja mana-mana govt controlled organisation is bound with burocracy); kewajipan menghadirkan diri ke program-program uni yang ENTAHAPAHAPA. kalau tak pegi tak dapat nak collect points, then next sem tak dapat duduk kolej; kursus-kursus uni yang maha boring dan ENTAHAPAHAPA (duduk bilik baca komik lagi bagus); kod pakaian yang bodoh. dan lain lagi.

# aku adalah cheapskate

# aku tak reti nak cerita / share masalah hidup aku dekat orang. my mind halts at the thought of opening up.

# nampak aku ketawa, buat lawak bodoh etc..tapi hati aku tengah risau macam nak mati.

# i condone freedom to discuss anything and everything, politics and religion included

# kadang-kadang rasa nak transport diri hidup kat pulau. tanpa kerisauan (kecuali tsunami ha ha), boleh mandi laut sepanjang masa, tak payah pakai kasut (and much clothings too).


im off, for now



on why I think abortion should be legalised

I am a practising Muslim and this is me being at risk of blasphemy accusation. But before anyone jumps at this and shoots bullet to my head, there is no mention of blasphemy in the Holy Book. So hear me out first.

This, is my personal view.

Don’t get me wrong, I love babies, kids and the joy they bring to the world. I too would love to have them in future. In future, yes, not now. Why? Because I am physically and mentally not ready to have them. Love is all that matters, you say? My baby would need more than parental love  to survive I think. I am not eating right, god knows the kind of junks I digest daily. Slowly but surely I want to have the best of food (non-toxic, organic matters) to nurture my body into the best of health it can be for it to grow a child inside. Among many other matters, yes I don’t think I’m ready yet. But that’s just me.

What about these people? You think they deserve to bear children?

“A mother and stepfather who confined their teenage son to a bedroom for years with little food were each sentenced to 15 years in prison Thursday after pleading guilty to cruelty to children and false imprisonment charges….Mitch Comer stood 5-foot-1 and weighed 87 pounds when he raised the suspicion of a guard at the bus station. He told police his stepfather put him on a bus on his 18th birthday with a few hundred dollars cash and a list of homeless shelters.”

(source : yahoo news)

“The woman accused of smothering her newborn boy is now getting medical treatment at the Tuanku Ampuan Rahimah Hospital…It was reported yesterday that a 24-year-old a salesgirl allegedly smothered the baby when she hid him under a mattress at a house in Jalan Meru, Klang.”

(source : The Star)

These scum worth of parents, should they have gotten abortion? Yes, please. rather than bringing an unwanted child into this world and having him suffer, if not dead. It’s just so heartbreaking to read these kind of news on daily basis. 

My point is, if you don’t want to get pregnant but still want to enjoy regular sex, please by all means, buy condoms. wear two at once if you must. and if you’re married and need to have a child just because everyone else’s does, then please think about it. Before you commit to anything, ask yourself these; are you mentally / physically / financially ready? Does you husband or wife has what it takes to support you in this process? Would you be able to provide your child a comfortable (not much can we do on the current crime filled society anyway) for him or her to live? Would you promise yourself to give your child the best education that he/she deserves? I’m not referring to monetary value, the best is referred to in terms of value wise and quality wise. A small home filled with love is heavenly while a mansion with no love can be the opposite. It is your choice, really.

Some thoughts to ponder..

I deeply hope that people are not having kids to make sure someone takes care of them when they are senile. 


then it fell apart, fell apart

scene one


water dripping from tap in the sink. the female protagonist closes the tap and spit the remains of toothpaste coated with saliva into the sink. she then gargles.


the ceiling fan circling lazily. the female protagonist looks sullenly at the array of her clothing inside the wardrobe and then she looks outside the window.


the female protagonist steadies herself by holding on to the railing above her, in the middle of morning crowd in the subway train. she is being pushed but manages to support herself. she looks forlornly outside the window.

scene two

the sound of the tapping of the pen. the female protagonist is deep in her thought, staring blankly at her laptop while other co-workers are talking near her. a guy is making jokes. the others laugh loudly.

{boss’ room}

a guy (menacing look, good looking, late 40s) comments on her performance. he is not happy with her. they are both unhappy of being put in that situation in the same room. she gives him a blank look. that makes him angrier.

scene three

{inside the female protagonist’s car}

she waits inside her car. at the nice neighbourhood, in the evening. there are the sounds of a flock of birds flying to their nests, kids laughing and parents coming home in their cars. her eyes are fixed on a house across where she parks her car. a guy (identifiable as the boss in the former scene; has the back to the audience) coming out of the car parked at that house. he is greeted by the kids (around 10 and 8 years old; girl and boy). she waits until everyone has gone inside the house.

the female protagonist then comes out of her car. the camera focuses at her feet. then she withdraws an axe from her car and slowly walking towards the house.

(cue extreme ways by moby)




jangan jadi jumud

orang lain quote Nietzsche dalam penulisan mereka. gunakan philosophy keluhan Nietzsche dan aplikasikan dalam kehidupan mereka. good for them. at least they have something, someone to look up to. ada kebanyakan hidup berlandaskan Al-Qur’an dan by the book they say. good for them, they are the believers and the faithful ones. the world is greying, filled with dusts of sins never been thwarted. we do need the righteous ones in this world, i think. there are people plastering blasphemy accusations onto others, raging over muslims befriending and calling for christmas merriment with their christian neighbours. Haram katanya. jangan minum kopi ini, haram, jangan bagi anak minum milo, masyaallah haram.

jihad! aku harus jihad! berkatalah benar walaupun pahit! seorang muslim wajib menegur rakan muslimnya. itu wajib!

all of them, they’re mortals, sinners. dan yang obvious (mungkin tidak pada mereka), they’re trollers and labelists. internet trollers tanpa nama, berani berkata menggunakan papan kekunci tetapi tidak di mulut tidak berpedang.

jangan jadi jumud.

i am sleepy.